well.... Oh well. Apparently nothing at all

//And so the masochistic Lamb feel in love with the stupid lion. && Nothing became of it...
I gave up on my new love last night...seriously.
It would've been a big mistake to continue waiting for him...
Just as I said, temporary.

I feel so overwhelmed and drained when it comes to dealing with other people.

I want to cry right now.

I probably will later on tonight .. in hope of releasing some pressure.
I feel [so] alone. I feel like I'm at the age [or stage] where no one can come up to me and offer me a hug. Have I really given off that I'm busy/ clammed up vibe? I assure you I'm not as assertive as I guess people think. I have all the time in the world!

• & Big girls don't cry

*
*

After waking Peanut up with a batch of brownies and riding him around I went to a real youth group today with Lumi. It was different in a good way. I so use to my church and its 99.8% black community that it was nice seeing white and Asian kids running around lol.
We played games in and out doors. [It was hot.]
& afterward It was like church; Singing, testimonies, offerings and a sermon. *Sigh* As powerful as he thought his words were, the church leader dude still couldn't reach this heart of mines.
I felt very spiritual at that moment almost as if he was talking to me but it still sounding weird to me ears so I listened and prayed in silence. I would like to try Stephs Youths groups, she always seems to be having a fun.. and competitive time. Nice way to meet new ppl too.

[Calvin W and his little sister was there today.]

What is it that I want to believe in?? We reap what we sow..So, what do I want to . produce?

[insert big ass question mark here]

Beautiful & Broken. 11:17pm
Current Song Gravity By Sarah Bareilles