Bite my tounge

I apologize to everyone whom I've affected within the past month; strangely enough this is also including Tanesha. I've been acting out. Miss behaving.
Adding paper to flames.
I do not feel well about this matter at all. It's making me feel sick. To think I wanted it, I craved it; seeking the unseen. Every time I catch myself beginning to think the thought and planning to walk that walk I want to kick myself hard enough that I double over.
This draining feeling which I feel is someone else fault, is none other than my own self inflicting parasite. I cannot pretend I feel comfortable with my declarations, nor can I regret them either. Sooner than later I will find the will power to accept the things that can not be changed.
I regularly find myself processing and outputting data base on only what I know about myself in addition to memories, what I believe to be the most un biased, accurate resolutions; its just that when I focus on my current sources of energy I feel hunky dory.
As a result, I see now that I can not and I do not need Ron's love, his time, his attention, his friendship.
I'd like it, I dream about it, but that comes down to nothing in the end.
I want hope, but in this case hope is just a distraction. Hope didn't get us here, our actions did, or rather the lack of action when most critical. I need to look at what has a chance of surviving in the long run.
Truth. I wasn't strong enough.
Truth. I had fallen in love with limerance.
Truth. I am responsible for what I am feeling now.

-----thief**
Usagi you don't see me, I don't see you. They can't see me. I can't see them. ** We are blind; ignorant and without a hint of frustration in our throats we dance to the beat of our own drums. I so childishly held a grudge that consumed our friendship. All I ask is for you to one day be able to look at yourself and see that the clay is still soft. SING. I will be right beside you dear, whenever I am ..right be side you.

With all these mistake we must surely be learning

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Jojo .. shit just got serious man. I'm hoping that by the end of this week I'll have purchased my sketch book and maybe a mediocre pack of color pencils. We will make sales and drop panties. Hahaha. I believe in you as much as I believe you believe in me.@_@
So let's shoot for the stars baby!
BCR[Black Colored Rainbows] will one day make it's debut.
P.S I'm starting to get the Prom Season Butterflies lol.
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Guitar lesson are going slow, my fingers hurt yet no calluses.

• Mike your a great person and teacher; as soon as he hit the 1st couple of chords to "I'm yours" my heart beat sped up. I look forward to working with you again.
  

• Rakkum your lessons were a bit to showy, I'm pretty sure you just wanted to prove to me that you could play but its all good. I did learn a better way to hold the neck up.
• Kwaun, I haven't seen you in forever dude, I hope our lessons this week will go by well, from what I heard your a friggin beast. I guess it would only be right to tip you.

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I wanna be the best double Pokemon battler out there son.

PS2. my big sister Sir really came through for me the other night. Thnx a bunch ilu <3

night world